Opt Out Humor

1. Every student measured against same narrow, irrelevant set of standards

2. Holds teachers personally accountable for success of large, monolithic testing organizations

3. Western tradition of critical thinking best embodied in bubble-sheet format

4. Keeps students quiet for upwards of 90 minutes

5. Repeated testing carefully develops teachers’ cheating skills

6. Only biased against kids who couldn’t afford college anyway

7. Data. More data.CONS

8. There are easier ways to measure parents’ income

9. Takes up time that could be used to teach toward additional standardized tests

10. Standardized test–scoring machines kill and maim more than 200 workers annually

11. Allows U.S. students to be compared with those of other developed nations

12. Fails to measure attractiveness, which will have far greater impact on future success or failure

13. Students may in fact become too prepared for future

14. Probably could be more profitable